Impressions:

Impressions:

 9. QUO MODO NATURA SUA EST LEGENDA.

(How One Should Consider One’s Nature)

Deem not therefore that thy lightest Fancy is witless: it is a Word to thee, a Prophecy, a Sign or Signal from thy Lord. Thy most unconscious Acts are Keys to the Treasure-Chamber of thine own Palace, which is the House of the Holy Ghost. Consider well thy conscious Thoughts and Acts, for they are under the Dominion of thy Will, and moved in Accord with the Operation of thy Reason; this indeed is a necessary work, enabling to comprehend in what manner thou mayst adjust thyself to thine Environment. Yet is this Adaptation but Defence for the most Part, or at the best Subterfuge and Stratagem in the Tactics of thy Life, with but an accidental and subordinate Relation to thy true Will, whereof by Consciousness and by Reason thou mayst be ignorant, unless by Fortune great and rare thou be already harmonized in thyself, the Outer with the Inner, which Grace is not common among Men, and is the Reward of previous Attainment.

Neglect not simple Introspections, therefore; but give yet greater Heed unto those Dreams and Phantasies, those Gestures and Manners unconscious, and of undiscovered Cause, which betoken thee.

Liber Aleph: Aleister Crowley

We lose ourselves in magick, even though, for most of us, it is the very place where we first found ourselves. Magicians are not of the herd, they seldom want what the average man or woman wants, in fact, to be and to stay committed to a path such as that given to us by the A.’.A.’., it could be said, that such a person must be insane. There are no material rewards in it for us, no earthly glory to be gained by way of this toil. But that was never what any of us signed up for. Any magician, who is always looking to find fault in others, or validation from them, or in a way presents this as something that needs to be revered that sets him apart as superior from the rest of humanity, or that it may manifest his every desire, is either insincere, or he is a liar and a fraud. Magick is subjective, it is the art and science of causing change subjectively, one cannot influence the weather or affect global affairs through magickal means. Magick will not give you what you want, it will give you what you need, until such time that you know what it is you truly want.

We start by asking questions: what made me get so angry, what about this situation made me behave in this way, is my aversion to that person justified, what about that person is making me feel this way, how can I love or hate such a person and are these feelings rational even if they are, what is the reason for my reaction? Then there are the dogs, I listen to their words and I pay attention to their attacks, and then I feel it, I ask myself what I am feeling and whether or not the way I am feeling is rational, what about this current experience is making me feel differently to an experience that was similar in almost every respect? One must also look at circumstances and memories and ask the same questions pertaining to them. These feelings are sometimes unbearably painfully and uncomfortable and sometimes joyful—pleasurable to the extreme, but this is what we are looking for. The humiliation, the fear, the uncertainty and anger, the joy, the love, the compassion, empathy and even the peace when in the company of a certain individual, in a certain environment, or the experience is associated with a specific set of circumstances; when evaluated, these questions may all shed light into the darkness of our inner worlds. We need these things to develop, whether painful or pleasurable; that through them we cultivate our Souls. Self-knowledge is the first requisite for any of us, and it is via our introspection that we attain mastery over our emotions, thoughts and feelings. Looking outward, trying to find someone or circumstances to blame, to run away or to look away from; defeats the entire purpose of this first injunction.

It has been documented, that aspirants and initiates of the Holy Order, throughout history, have in many cases been subject to slanderous attacks, and some have been tortured and killed for their association. There is nothing very glamorous about that prospect, and even so, some of us take on our responsibilities in full knowledge of this fact, that at the outset, we have accepted the opposition of the people as a potential fate. In the beginning, we are taught that to love the world and humanity is the highest adoration. Then we work to set ourselves apart from that very unity that we hold in such high regard. It is a tearing away from the mother that leaves us isolated and alone, that we may re-establish our relationship with her on our own terms and in a more perfect manner.

We have, under such circumstances, no choice but to enter into a deep and honest dialogue with ourselves, as there is truly nobody else to talk to. We must never allow ourselves to be dragged down so low as to partake in those things that are most detestable within the heart of humanity. We must be better; and instead of stooping to that level, to rather become quiet and to find answers from inside with which to move forward with integrity and pride; the pride of knowing that I am not an animal, that I am more refined. If I become, in any way, like that which I hate most, I would surely end up hating myself. How could I live with myself? But like this; I can live with pride in the reflection staring back at me, and I can die knowing that I didn’t negate my Soul for the sake of belonging or getting along. Know thyself; seems to be a rather straight forward injunction, but the way to accomplish it is to have nothing else to look at or to study; but to look into the very centre of one’s being demands isolation and a willingness to look at things that most people will never see. It is lonely, and so this must be done under Will. In order for this to be accomplished, one must become still and quiet, he must explore his inner world of symbols, and he must recognize and analyze his impressions without paying attention to the noise of the external world. Although, and this is where the difficulty lies: he must, even from his sense of isolation and indifference maintain harmony between himself and the world. This is achieved by utilizing the intellect and the Four Powers of the Sphinx and evaluating what habits, and behaviors as well as impressions don't serve his progress and cutting them away as they arise. Thereby he cultivates an environment of peaceful congruence that is absolutely essential to him at this stage in his magickal development.

31. For these fools of men and their woes care not thou at all! They feel little; what is, is balanced by weak joys; but ye are my chosen ones.

32. Obey my prophet! follow out the ordeals of my knowledge! seek me only! Then the joys of my love will redeem ye from all pain. This is so: I swear it by the vault of my body; by my sacred heart and tongue; by all I can give, by all I desire of ye all.

Liber AL: Chapter I, Verse 31,32:

25. Ye are against the people, O my chosen!

Liber AL: Chapter II, Verse 25:

The attacks of the people are in a way a blessing, that they serve to tear open new wounds and potential repressions from which we gain deeper insight into our Souls. They extend our circumference, that through this magick we attain greater control as our understanding of the semiotic relationship between the elements that shape our realities increase. The scars serve as reminders of those things we have overcome, those things that have aided in our development, albeit, some things we may have chosen to ignore, they are all things that we have entered into a relationship with, that have formed a part of us. Some of it may be neatly tucked away and avoided to form part of our shadows, but all of it fosters the unique character of every individual Soul. There is always a yearning to be reunited with the mother, however, this marriage is only possible once perfection is attained. Therefore, this initial step is of the utmost importance. As it teaches us what is of use to us, and what must be cut away. The Will of a magician and his intellect are the only tools he has to help him overcome these trials, as the yearning is there, and the herd will reinforce to him the idea that there is merit in his premature return to the world. Thus, his reward will only be attained in remaining steadfast, and by cutting away the false phantoms that seek to lure him, and guide him back from whence he came.